The Agrinautica

   This weekend we had Picnic Day up at Davis. It is the yearly open-house of the university and is generally a marathon day of revelry for most of the students. Previous to this year I've attended it every year for the past six years.

   However, this weekend also happened to be the weekend of the American-Pacific (AMPAC) Model United Nations conference, of which I was the Secretary-General. As such I unfortunately missed this year's picnic day.


   Anyway, as Secretary-General, I was, along with the Governor-General Sameer Kanal, in charge of running the conference, so it was a different experience than my usual chairing of committees. I definitely preferred chairing committees, and for next year's AMPAC, provided it is not the same day as Picnic Day, I will be back to chairing a committee.

   I had been in charge of putting together this year's staff, so, as I mentioned in an earlier entry, many of my favourite MUN personalities were with us this weekend. Swati "Swat Team" Srivistava and Matt "Papa Smurf" Wilkerson made me proud running Security Council, and I was very glad I took Matt's recommendation on Afshin "Afro-sheen" Haghgoo.
   On the subject of nicknames, we had two female Alex's that needed to be differentiated. Eventually, as they were from Ukraine and Guatamala, respectively, someone decided they should be referred to as "Ukraine-alex" and "Guatamala-alex." This of course quickly becomes Ukrainelex and Guatalex. Guatalex (pronounced Guata-lex) stuck well, but Ukrainelex sounded like a pharmaceutical company. Anyway, Ukrainelex mutated to Ukrinelex and then Ukrinex, and finally settled on Equinox.


How Sameer flustered Guatalex's Boyfriend
   One of the most memorable moments from the conference was a certain prank Gov-Gen Sameer and I played on Guatalex. As usual, when it came down to administer conference evaluations to her committee, Sameer and I took over the dias and Guatalex and her vice chair Julie were sent from the room. It so happened that Alex had had a computer she was keeping track of things on, and had an internet connection, and, it turns out, was signed in to a chat program.
   Shortly after we took over we got a messege from her boyfriend. Sameer and I looked at eachother and quickly knew what we absolutely had to do -- we had a moral obligation to pretend to be her and carry on a conversation with her boyfriend!!! And he certainly wasted no time bringing us hilarious results. The entire conversation went more or less like this:
Him: Hey
Alex(us): hey honey
Him: I'm so horny (!!)
Alex(us): Me too, being in committee all day makes me so flustered!
Him: When I visit you this evening do you think we can get one of the hotel rooms to ourselves for a little bit?
Alex(us): I'll see what I can do ;)
   As you can see, the lulz certainly were forthcoming! Anyway, we left the conversation on the screen when Guatalex resumed control of the committee, in order to alarm her properly. Apparently as soon as she noticed she very abruptly excused herself and hunted down Sameer and punched him several times in the arm. (= Anyway, her boyfriend showed up that evening and I teased her mercilessly. She claims she didn't despoil any of our rooms.



   Other than that, another highlight of the conference for me was guest-speaking. When a committee wants to get the perspective of a country or entity that is not represented in the committee, we either get someone representing said county from another committee to guest speak, or have a staff member to represent said entity.
   Both the Security Council, and our Organization of the Islamic Conference (OIC)committee had the subject of Somalia, and I have been following events there myself, so I guest spoke in both committees on the subject. In the Security Council I spoke as a representative of Ethiopia, regarding our continued support of the Transitional Federal Government (TFG) and military action against the Islamic Courts Union (ICU). About an hour later I spoke to the OIC as a representative of the ICU, regarding our resistance to the Ethiopian invaders and the puppet TFG government. It was quite fun and I got a very extensive amount of positive feedback from the committee about how much they appreciated my doing that.


Crisis!
   Friday night we had a middle-of-the-night Security Council crisis. For this our staff had to batten down and start preparing at 11pm, by 1:30am we were marauding the halls pounding on delegates doors, and shortly thereafter we got it going. A few delegates snuck off but most were there until it ended with a return to the status quo at around 5am I believe.
   As to the crisis itself, basically Israeli special forces conducted an operation in Iran and discovered evidence of an advanced nuclear weapons programme. However some of the force was discovered. So from the delegates perspective it started with Iran parading captured Mossad agents and protesting the incident, however this was quickly followed by news of Israeli airstrikes against the discovered weapons sites. There was then military build-ups on both sides and I believe nothing but negotiations for the next several hours. I don't know, I left at 3am.
   I know night SC crises are common, but I personally completely fail to see what is so exciting about being awake all night and doing committee while everyone else is either having fun or catching up on sleep. Maybe I'm just a scrooge. Anyway it left me running the conference the next morning with half my staff (and the Governor-General) still asleep until noon.


Picture of the Day

I just think this is an awesome picture. Thats the OIC Director and Chair in the background, with Somalia (TFG) front left

AMPAC 2006 (finally)
   Returning from Vegas about a week and a half ago, I worked for a day, then there was the first day of school, and then I flew down to LA for the AMPAC 2006 Model UN conference.
   So much spam had built up in my email inbox that I didn't notice I had emails notifying me two classes were cancelled that Wednesday (since the second day of class for most people wasn't for four more days so not even half the teachers could be bothered to be present for Wednesday), so I waisted at least three hours altogether waiting around for classes that weren't going to happen.
   Kristy & I had dinner at Fuzios (see picture below).

   Took a 9:30pm flight on Southwest from Sacramento airport, arriving in LAX at around 10:30. There I met up with my co-chair Mara Stringfield, & Security Council chair Sameer Kanal & we proceeded to the Biltmore Hotel. There we caught up with the rest of the staff where they were playing poker in the massive executive suite on the 11th floor. Mara & I were persuaded to join the poker game, & though Mara claimed she'd never played before and had no idea what she was doing, she totally fleeced the lot of us.

( Thursday: Secret Passages, the 13th Floor, & Helipads )

( Friday: All Night Security Council Session Leaves Chair W/ Hickey )

( Sat/Sunday: Building Forts & Storming Staff )

Picture of the Day

Kristy is excited to receive her Fuziotini at Fuzios

Previously on Emosnail
   A Week & Three Years Ago Yesterday: Back in Davis - Returned from Spring Break. Disappointed to find The Dominion of Blehtahepdakorum no longer classified as a "psychotic dictatorship," rather its rated "Iron Fist Consumerist"
   A Week & Three Years Ago Today: First Day of Spring Qtr 2003 - Taking RUS3, COM6 (Myths & Legends), ENL5F (writing fiction, waitlisted) & HIS131C (Ancien Regime). I'd end up dropping the History class, but getting into the English class (and many lulz would ensue from people's crappy ass writing). I think I added another class later to replace the HIS... Mum is visiting, showed her around campus ... Blehahepdakorum now a "Corporate Police State."
   Three Years Ago Last Sunday: I Get A Girlfriend - Not really, that announcement was actually an April Fools joke, because the thought of me ever having a girlfriend was widely seen as pretty preposterous. This year April Fools Day came and went and I didn't notice -- I wish I had, I'd have totally fucked with my committee. Back in Davis this April (2006) Daviswiki apparently instituted a hilarious prank, becoming MyDaviswikiSpace. For serious luls scroll down to the conversation just below the pictures of cars and see how butthurt MatthewKeys got over the issue.
   Three Years Ago Last Monday: AFI Show - I get paid $20/hr to see AFI. Place was swarming with posers. Vanessa Kritlow & Sachi make a documentary outside called "Poser Disposer." I think I eventually saw it and it was pretty funny. Also Davis police storm the campus dorms in "groups of ten" to apprehend a freshman accused of counterfitting IDs ... Blehtahepdakorum once again "Iron Fist Consumerist"
   Three Years Ago Last Tuesday: You Can Never Have Too Much Rain - More on Blehtahepdakorum. Eric Talevich of local band The List creates a nation "modeled as much after our garage as possible" "Beef-Based Agriculture is big there, too."
   Three Years Ago Last Wednesday: Bowling For Michael Moore - There once was a time when most people didn't realize that Michael Moore is a less scrupulous propagandist than Joseph Goebbels. I stumbled upon this article which very effectively exposed Bowling For Columbine for the insult to truth that it is, at first some stuck to their guns and rallied to Moore's defence, but I think three years later its pretty much accepted that the words "truth," "honesty," or "documentary" should probably not be said in the same sentence as his name. ...but he's filthy rich now so he could care less.
   Three Years Ago Last Thursday: Show at the Loyola House III - Ate at Fuzios. The List & other bands play at the Loyola House.
   Three Years Ago Yesterday: Rush Spermcat!! - Amended some commercial flyers which had been (illegally) posted on campus bulletin boards to start the "Rush Spermcat" campaign. I think later I get my hands on some pictures of them. ...Blehtahepdakorum now a "Moralistic Democracy?!"